Good Deed: #48 Respect your husband

  • “Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has made one of them to excel the other, and because they spend (to support them) from their means. Therefore, the righteous women are devoutly obedient (to Allah and to their husbands), and guard in the husband’s absence what Allah orders them to guard (e.g., their chastity and their husband’s property).” (4: 34)
  • “Your women are tilth for you (to cultivate) so go to your tilth when you like and do good beforehand for yourselves, and fear Allah, and know that you will (one day) meet Him. Give glad tidings to believers, (O Muhammad)” (2:223)
  • Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, “When a man calls his wife to his bed, and she does not respond and he (the husband) spends the night angry with her, the angels curse her until morning”.[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].
  • Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, “By Him in Whose Hand is my life, when a man calls his wife to his bed, and she does not respond, the One Who is above the heaven becomes displeased with her until he (her husband) becomes pleased with her”.[Al-Bukhari and Muslim]
  • Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, “It is not lawful for a woman to observe (voluntary) fasting without the permission of her husband when he is at home; and she should not allow anyone to enter his house without his permission.”[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].
  • Ibn `Umar (May Allah be pleased with them) reported: The Prophet (PBUH) said, “All of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects. The ruler is a guardian of his subjects, the man is a guardian of his family, the woman is a guardian and is responsible for her husband’s house and his offspring; and so all of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects.”[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].
  • Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: The Prophet (PBUH) said, “If I were to order anyone to prostrate himself before another, I would have ordered a woman to prostrate herself before her husband”.[At-Tirmidhi]
  • Umm Salamah (May Allah be pleased with her) reported: Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, “Any woman dies while her husband is pleased with her, she will enter Jannah”.At-Tirmidhi].
  • Jabir bin Abdallah Al-Ansari: Once the Prophet (s.a.w.) said:”The best of your women is the prolific, the affectionate, the chaste, the endeared of her family, the humble to her husband, fortified against other than him, listens to what he says, and obeys his orders, offers herself to him when alone, but not in an unabashed manner like his.”
  • Prophet (s.a.w.) and asked him: “O Messenger of Allah, tell me what right has the husband upon the wife?” He said: “A lot.” She said: “Explain me some of them.” He replied “She may not fast without his permission, nor may she go out of her house without his consent. She has to use the best of perfumes, to wear the best of her clothes, to adorn herself as best as she can, to offer herself to him day and night, and still his rights are more than that.”
  • Aisha(RA):”I asked the Prophet (saw): Who has the greatest right over a woman? He (sas) said: Her husband. I said: And who has the greatest right over a man? He (sas) saiid: His mother.” (Al-Haakim – taken from Fiqh As-Sunnah
  • It is related by Anas (R.A.) that the Prophet (S.A.W.) said “If a woman offers five times daily prayer, keeps the fasts of Ramadhan, guards her honour and obeys her husband, then she will enter Paradise by whichever gate she pleases.”
  • The Prophet (S.A.W.) has said “A woman who dies in the state that her husband is pleased with her, shall go to Paradise.”

Action Plan

1. Respect your husband he is the head and leader of the family. Like any kind of leader or ruler, he will be held accountable before Allah Most High: did he make the decision that is most befitting for his family in this life and the hereafter or did he simply follow his desires? Did he do what was just and right or simply do what he liked to do?

2. Ask your consent of your husband if you want to leave the home.

3. Ask consent of your husband if you want to fast.

4. It is established from many hadith that the wife is not to allow anyone inside if she knows that her husband does not like for that person to be in the house (male or female).

5.The wife should pay proper attention to her makeup and appearance, to attract the husband.

6. A wife should respond to his sexual inclinations, since this is quite effective in pulling the man to his wife and strengthening the relations of love between them. She should provide him with ways of enjoying her beauty and satisfy his desires and prevent him the temptation of throwing himself into the traps of forbidden desires.

7. Be grateful to your husband. A wife should be thankful to her husband for his kindness and his efforts in looking after her welfare and happiness.
Source: Rights of the Husband Over the Wife

Other resources

Good Deed: #26 Be grateful

Good Deed: #34 Be intimate with your spouse

Good Deed: #35 Listen

Good Deed: #23 Make Taubah – Repent

Good Deed: #24 Forgive

Good Deed: #25 Be Patient

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